Defining Hospitality

Dan Ryan: Today's guest is an interior designer who's become a household name. She's been frequently featured on H D T V as a host and mentor on Battle on the Beach and build it forward.

She's a forward thinking designer whose work is revered by many. She was hand selected by Ellen DeGeneres as her brand ambassador on QVC and has been featured on Rachel Ray, Oprah, and many, many others. She is. The principal and an interior designer at Tanya Nyak. Design. Ladies and gentlemen, Tanya Nyak.

Taniya Nayak: Hello. How are you?

Dan Ryan: welcome.

Taniya Nayak: You know I've spent so much time with you over the last.

Couple of days

Dan Ryan: I know it's been a crash course in Dan and Tanya.

Taniya Nayak: Time. I know, and I love it and I feel like I've known you forever.

Dan Ryan: Well, thank you. I feel like I've known you forever as well. And

Taniya Nayak: and we'll

Dan Ryan: just tee this up cuz so just so everyone knows.

We're here in Arizona at this conference called Ho Tech, and I was interviewing you on kind of like what your story is. Oh, I forgot to also mention you're a podcaster. Um, but like how you came to be and to be such an influencer and have successful businesses and entrepreneur and team builder and inspiration to many.

So we did that in front of what, 200 and something people.

Taniya Nayak: it was awesome. I mean, you're a phenomenal interviewer.

Let me start off with that first. Um, super grateful. Thank you for, for your thoughtful questions today. I feel like you made the audience feel really inclusive in our conversation. I. One person came up to me after, and they said that they felt like we were speaking to each person individually in that great big room of people, which is probably one of the best compliments you could get.

Right? We weren't up there just talking, and I think that that's why us having a conversation was really important versus just standing at a podium and having a talk.

Dan Ryan: Exactly. And because, well, in doing all these con, like in the doing these conversations, I don't moderate things that often. Or if I am seeing an event, um, I'm really trying to figure out, okay, I may have you having a conversation here, but how do I make sure that the audience is engaged?

And again, it's thinking about, I. Who they are. Who am I talking to?

Taniya Nayak: It's an art, it's a skill. It really is. It doesn't come naturally for a lot of people. It comes naturally for you. I think it comes naturally for me as well, but when we're speaking, we're not getting lost in a conversation that maybe the rest of the group has no idea what we're talking about.

And that's important. It seems silly, but it, it happens a lot.

Dan Ryan: Correct. And we gotta understand the room. And actually that's a really good transition point into like the question I ask everyone, which is how do you define hospitality? Because in so many of the conversations, you know, it's about others, right?

And I think that we were in front of all these people, but for me, I just really wanted to make sure that not only you were comfortable, but we were engaging everyone. So Tanya

Taniya Nayak: How do I define hospitality?

Dan Ryan: what Yeah. How do you define it? Or like what or what does it mean to you?

Taniya Nayak: It means a lot of different things to me in a lot of different ways, uh, on a personal level.

I'll talk about how I define hospitality, but I'd also like to answer that question on a professional level. As a restaurant designer and a restaurant owner, I see hospitality from so many different perspectives and just points of view. So I'm gonna start with personally. Hospitality to me is having a guest in your home and making them feel so comfortable.

And this is to the point where if somebody's staying overnight, there's a bottle of water. On the nightstand, there's a little tray for their jewelry. There's. Slippers, you know the little things that are gonna make sure that they feel like you thought about it and you made the effort to make them feel special and feel welcome.

Asking them what they drink. Do they have food allergies? You know, having all of that on hand for when they do come. So, I think I was raised with that from my mom. She is one of the most hospitable people in the world. Her love language is food cooking for people. So I feel like it probably comes from that.

She's very nurturing. Um, from the

Dan Ryan: restaurant

Taniya Nayak: and design perspective, I'll talk design.

Dan Ryan: Mm-hmm.

Taniya Nayak: So when we design a space that is for hospitality purposes, or I, I'll lean into restaurant because that's really my forte. I wanna make sure that when the guest comes in and I'm just talking about design, so. They are greeted by a warm and inviting space that the lighting is at the right temperature, that the host at the host stand is welcoming with a smile.

Even though that's more operations, but at least the host stand is approachable. Um, I also wanna make sure that there's seating options in every way Imaginable date night. Family dinners, a group of girlfriends going out for the night. I wanna think about every single potential scenario, ADA compliance.

And we were just talking about that a little bit up on stage. Um, you did a wonderful talk. there's a lot of things that are factored into the design, including the warmth. And does the design match the menu? I mean, that seems. Like a no-brainer, but you'd be surprised how many times you walk into a restaurant and it doesn't match the menus So from a design angle, there's that. Now my husband is a restaurateur. He does operations, and if you can only imagine what the first 15 minutes of any restaurant experience is like for us, we do the whole Well, what would you do different?

Dan Ryan: Well, actually I'm very intrigued by that because to ha to you both be entrepreneurs and have these restaurants and you design all these other restaurants, I'm curious like as a fly on the wall when you're kicking off a new project, That you own a restaurant that you own together, and he's looking at it operational and you're looking at it from a de design perspective.

I know I'm sure you overlap on the margins, but what are the kinds of conversations you get in or those little, those battles about, okay, I understand you want it to flow this way, but from an aesthetic we, you know, we have to really think of our customer. What kind of, um, I guess creative tension, right?

Right. Comes up in, in the birthing of many of these projects,

Taniya Nayak: I probably designed his first restaurant maybe 17 years ago. So I would say those battles were heavy in the beginning and is because we had blurred lines.

I felt like if I was giving him input on the operations side of it, he's an expert at that. But I have an opinion and he would give me input on the design side of it. I'm an expert on that, but of course, he has an opinion and we've learned a little bit more to kind of stay in our lanes, so to speak. But we, we've found this wonderful synergy now, and I, I don't feel like we really get into too many kind of issues because we, we've been doing this for so long, probably 25 different concepts at this point in our, in, throughout our marriage, our relationship.

So the, the underlying initial ones were. You know, I really wanted a curved bar. Well, a curved bar is a lot more expensive than a straight angled bar. Do you need the curved bar? He might ask.

Dan Ryan: and what would you say?

Taniya Nayak: Of course I do. Do I need the curved bar? Of course. I need the curved bar. So then we'll have these conversations about the.

The experience for the guest and how it feels for them to sit at a curved bar versus the angle. If they're walking in the front door, they walking into the corner of the bar, are they looking at an angle? Because to me that's harsh and it's not welcoming and inviting. So we might agree on a chamford cornered edge, you know?

So we will meet in the middle and we'll get to that point. But if we've now done enough of them that I don't feel like we run into too many issues, I will push. And he knows I'm very conscious with budget and all of those things. So if there's something I feel really strongly about, I will push for it.

And he's now better.

Dan Ryan: And you always get your way.

Taniya Nayak: I mean,

Dan Ryan: um, okay. So I, I think that that. From a design or aesthetic and an operational, I, I think that, you know, it's always a balance and I'm glad you always win on the design side because I, uh, you know, there's this always this rumor that, or not rumor, it's more of a saying or thought that if you're doing a hotel room and operations has all the say, it would be a stainless steel room that you could just hose off because it makes sense, it's efficient, and uh, you just turn 'em and burn 'em.

Go. But, As people, we don't like that. Um, again, it's about how we feel in these places, and I think finding that balance between operations and design is, it's an art,

Taniya Nayak: It is.

Dan Ryan: there is science to it, but it's really,

Taniya Nayak: It's an art. It is. It is art. I, I agree with you. It's color, it's texture, it's different mediums. It's art. A hundred percent. But you did ask me to define hospitality, and I would say that hospitality, my definition of it begins long before you experience that finished room be for a user, for a guest coming in.

It is a lot about their marketing. Long before, you know, what does that resort look like? Ooh, I wanna go there. Let me compare this main suite to that main suite. Is this one facing the ocean? Is that, you know, and there's a lot of comparison. So when somebody makes a commitment to either dine at a restaurant or stay at a resort, they've put a lot of time and energy into it, even before setting foot into it.

So that is a huge part of this hospitality experience that people may not talk about

Dan Ryan: And a major responsibility too.

Taniya Nayak: to live up to it. So now you've got the bells and whistles. You sold it. Now can you deliver? And so having a guest come in and actually feel like they got what they paid for, they got what they came for.

That's. A lot of work and that is also just its whole other beast. So matching that it's immersive, an immersive experience from start to finish, from planning to marketing, to execution and you know what the end goal is. Right.

Dan Ryan: No,

Taniya Nayak: A good Yelp review.

Dan Ryan: Oh yeah. I'm sure there are many goals, but yeah. Ultimately, It's that marketplace of feedback that really helps so much based on other people's past experiences. It changes the trajectory, good or bad, of how a business, hotel or restaurant is are gonna operate.

Taniya Nayak: Right. And I even say it jokingly, this Yelp review thing, but it's a lot easier for someone to complain on Yelp than it is for them to write a good review.

Good reviews are everything. So I encourage people, if they have a great dining experience or a great server or an amazing hotel experience to write about it, it goes so far. I mean, think about how many reviews you've looked at. If you're buying a mattress, you know, or you're, you're buying a pair of shoes online, you're gonna look at those reviews and, and you really focus on the bad ones.

But when you see a good one, you're like, oh, okay.

Dan Ryan: It's interesting on the, on Yelp or other, Even open table or all these kind of booking engines, on all these OTAs. I do find that many of them, it's the negative responses they get posted. Right. And I do, but whereas I also find on Amazon it's a much more helpful community. Somehow they do a good job of getting people to write five star and one star. So I'll always read like the best reviews, but then I want to check

Taniya Nayak: what,

Dan Ryan: what, what's the bottom baseline scenario.

Taniya Nayak: I'm sure there's a whole big team behind Amazon making sure that both of those reviews are equally matched. Totally.

Dan Ryan: Totally. But invariably that feedback from other people, other humans is kind it, it rings true. Yeah. Um, okay, so you're an entrepreneur, you have a design firm, but you have this, a whole other public persona, right?

Taniya Nayak: I would say it's my secret life, but it's not so secret. It is. It's very public.

Dan Ryan: it's out there. And on the TV side, and I know you also have a podcast that's called The Break.

And we spoke about this on stage, but for those of us, for those listeners who, who didn't hear that, I think people are always intrigued. And you would all you, that's a very intriguing question that I think I'm gonna incorporate. Um, but how did you get your break? as far as working in, working in bars, uh, selling hearing aids, you're doing all these things, but you weren't really in your.

In your purpose and passion.

Taniya Nayak: It wasn't in my skin, if you will.

Dan Ryan: Yeah. So how like, so how did you, you're going down this road, what kind of pulled you into a place where you're like, you know what, this is not who I am and I need to be on this other path. What was that moment? Cuz I don't think we actually spoke about that.

Taniya Nayak: Right. I think that what happens in our lives, especially when we're going to school and then we graduate and then it's time to get a job and then it's time to, we're, we're trying to fulfill.

In a dream world, we're fulfilling our own needs and what we want, but that's not, it's not, we're too young at that point. I think we're filling our parents' dreams or, or checking the boxes off of what you're supposed to do when you graduate from college or, or whatever it is. So I feel like I was checking boxes off that just weren't even, it wasn't even boxes in my. World, you know, I was just checking off some things. Okay. I went to school, I studied this, I got this degree, and now I'm working here. And none of it really applied to who I am or what I wanted to do. And I guess shame on me for not being better at listening to that. But, you know, I was young and trying to figure it out and, you know, I, I did mention to you that, uh, I'm.

Dan Ryan: I'm,

Taniya Nayak: I come from India. I have immigrant parents that moved here from India. There were some very strict rules in my house and and strong expectations, and so I feel like I was trying to meet those expectations. So what did I do? I bartended. I bartended probably the last thing on earth that my Indian strict parents wanted me to do.

You know, working in nightclubs late nights or whatever. But that actually was the best thing that could have ever happened for me because it afforded me enough money. To realize that in my day job, if it wasn't what I loved to do, then I was able to get out of it and not feel financially committed to staying at that job, which I guess is good and maybe bad, I don't know.

But it did give me the opportunity to, to take a breath. I went on a business trip with my sister. She was, it was her business trip. I tagged along when we were in Spain. I didn't have a cell phone. It was long ago, and I was just lying there, jet lagged and wide awake looking at the ceiling. My sister was fast asleep, didn't wanna make a noise because I was so like thankful that she let me tag along and I didn't wanna ruin her.

Her big meeting the next day. So it gave me a moment to think, and I think this might have a little bit to do with, uh, you know, I wish I meditated more, but I feel like this is kind of what might have happened. So to tell you that pivotal moment, it just ha it was a moment of quiet. It was a moment where I was in my own head and it gave me a second to think about where my life was going.

Was I happy? Is this what I wanna do with the rest of my life? And it all the answers were no, just.

Dan Ryan: Well, as we were up on stage and you were sharing this story, I wrote down the word intentionality, and I feel like maybe before you went on your current path, you were doing what just made sense, right? You're at in college, your attending bar after college, you're attending bar, you're doing other things.

But maybe it was that moment of silence and introspection or reflection that helped you set a path of intention.

Taniya Nayak: Yes, absolutely. And I, I mean, there was no outside noise. I didn't have friends calling or plans.

I was just somewhere in a foreign land with nothing but my thoughts. So I had that moment of I am too young to be doing a job that I don't love. I. For the rest of my life, and I don't care if I was in my twenties. You could be in your thirties, forties, fifties, sixties. You're always gonna be too young to do a job that you don't love for the rest of your life.

Does it get harder as we get older? Sure. We have more responsibilities. It's not easy to just get up and move, but that's why it's so important to not keep waiting when you feel it, act on it. Otherwise, the longer you wait, the harder it gets to change and get out of that. It's like mud.

Dan Ryan: Totally.

Taniya Nayak: right. You, you think it's harder to get out, so get out while your feet are just kind of touching

Dan Ryan: as you're saying it, I'm reminded of Danny Meyer who wrote the book Setting the Table and owns a bunch of restaurants in Shake Shack. But he, he was in college, I think he was going to law school and he, or no, he was gonna go to law school.

He was gonna take the lsat and he has this story, which I read a couple times in his book, or I, I didn't read his, I read his book once. I listened to parts of it another time. But it kind, it went over the first time I heard it and the second time it really jumped out. But when his uncle was like, Danny, do you really want to be a lawyer?

And he goes, not really. And his uncle said, you know, you're dead a lot longer than you're alive. And

Taniya Nayak: Mm, that's powerful. He takes

Dan Ryan: the path of his life. And he started working in restaurants and learning everything. Or he already knew so much about food, but he committed himself to that. And look what he's done. I mean, it was that, that kind of push when you were, um, Attending bar and, and doing all that other work before finding your, your true self.

Um, what was it like when your, when you went to your parents, you're like, mom, dad, I got a job attending bar. What did they say

Taniya Nayak: at first, you know, because it was always a side hustle for me. I was, I was. In school, I was studying, I was doing my, getting my, uh, bachelor's degree in marketing. So for them, they loved it.

I was making a ton of money, you know, and it, it helped a lot with paying for books and, you know, things like that. And so they didn't mind it. But when it became my only thing and I wasn't working for a while, I also wasn't married at the time. And there were so many things, like, such a disappointment, you know?

And so I, I feel like I. It was okay. They, they weren't thrilled about it. You know, my mom was always a little more open-minded to it, but my dad was, yeah, he came to this country because he had a full boat scholarship to m i T, so his expectations were very, very high. Growing up in school, he'd always say, Tony, if I got a B on a report card, I could have all A's and one B, and he'd be like, B stands for Pat.

You know? I mean, truly it was, it was. Pressure. You know, I love him dearly and I'm so thankful for how he taught my sister and I both to have our feet firmly planted on the ground and to always, you know, not take things for granted and make sure you have a backup plan. So I am super grateful for all of that, but you know, it was, as a kid, it's a lot.

Dan Ryan: Yeah. And then your mom, so he's b is bad. And what's your mom doing? Is she kind of echoing that? No,

Taniya Nayak: No, not at all. My mom is, uh, uh, just the most jolly sweet, you know, happy-go-lucky person you'll meet. So, you know, even I, I had made a decision to leave. This is yet another job. I was selling work wear clothing.

This is right after school. And I thought, gosh, I'd really love to travel and backpack across Europe. Right? This is, this is. After. I think I, I don't even know the timeline of this, but I ended up backpacking through Europe and my mom was like, do it, do it. You need to go do it. And I thought, I think about that a lot now because traditionally that's not something you typically hear,

you know,

or Indian parents saying.

But she was all

Dan Ryan: well, I can't speak for my Indian

Taniya Nayak: Yes.

Dan Ryan: but I do.

Appreciate that sense of adventure for her to push you. And I wonder if it, if she followed her path and maybe there was some regret and she wanted to

live vicariously through

Taniya Nayak: Mm-hmm. Possibly.

Dan Ryan: Interesting.

Taniya Nayak: Mm.

Dan Ryan: Okay, so you're in Barcelona, you have this moment of reflection, and then how do you find your way to the screen?

Right.

Taniya Nayak: Right. So, well, I, I ended up, there's a little baby step between that moment and the screen moment. So I ended up coming back from Spain. This is my sister's business trip when I had that moment of clarity. And I marched myself right into the Boston Architectural College and I applied for a master's in interior architecture.

I always wanted to be an architect. I just, uh,

Dan Ryan: didn't,

Taniya Nayak: it's like a much longer story, but I didn't follow that. And so, At this point, I'm like, it's time. I just need to really do something that I want to do, and that's what I wanted to do. And I didn't tell anybody. I didn't ask anybody. I didn't want anyone to persuade me one way or the other.

I find a lot of times that we often ask people, well, what do you think? Should I do it? What's your advice? They're not you only, you know you. Right? So it's, it's important to when you feel strongly in your belly, You feel strong in your gut that this is the right move. Don't ask, can anyone just do it? Just go do it.

So I did it and when I walked into the school, I got started. I filled everything out. I put my check down and then I. Every single thing in my life just,

Dan Ryan: you

Taniya Nayak: like, just suctioned right into place. And it was like, okay, this is where I belong. This is what I'm supposed to be doing. And those magical gates just opened up and all of a sudden, uh, there was a casting call for a TV show that the dean of the school told all the students, Hey, we think that you should go audition for this show.

It'd be a great learning experience. And so I did. And guess what? I got it. I got the job. Wow. And that's how the TV thing happened.

Dan Ryan: many people lined up at that first audition?

Taniya Nayak: There were probably, so collectively there were probably 500 candidates.

Dan Ryan: Just from Boston, or was it

Taniya Nayak: I think there was through. Areas in and around maybe even New York and Connecticut.

Um, because the production company was based in Boston at the time. And so I got that job and I didn't know what it meant. I didn't know what it looked like. I was horrible. I remember looking at the producers and they were like, I don't think this is gonna work out. So, but you know what, I, I got bit by the bug and I.

I love it. And one of the things that my dad had always taught me was, Hey, you know, you don't know this TV thing can come and go, so you should try to have your business try to keep, he was supportive of the show, but I think he didn't really get it very outside of his, his realm. So I did. I always had a business.

I did the TV shows. The one might have been heavier at a time than another, and I just kind of kept them both going. And the lesson I learned from that was that. In television, uh, I have a lot of friends that are freelancers, they're producers, they're writers, they're, you know, whatever they are doing out in the field when there's no show, there's no money.

Yeah. Right. And when there's no money, there's a lot of stress. And I luckily found a way to balance the two so that, hey, if a show didn't happen, it's fine. I got my business. I'll put my energy into that. Right now. So that,

Dan Ryan: think about, I was just at a party, uh, the other night and I saw a buddy of mine who's like a well known actor, um, director person, and I was like, so what you keeping busy?

And he's like, no. I was like, oh, the writer strike. Got it. So, but was that intentionally that you had your feet in those two ponds, so to speak, or,

Taniya Nayak: think it was just, again, it was my dad not really understanding what being on TV meant. And, and to him it kind of probably seemed like a fun and games kind of like another bartending gig kind of situation.

I think it made him a little nervous, like, what does this look like in the future? And so he was really pushing me to, you know, focus on having the business. You know, taking clients and doing, but that's because that's what he knows. That's that's what, he's an architect and he really sort of in his business like that, that's his life, you know?

So for him it made that made sense. He could connect with that, that that was relatable to him.

Dan Ryan: I'm just, I'm curious, like if you think about bartending. Then architecture school, they both involve late nights, right? Architecture school, you're in the studio pulling all nighters, bartending, you're up late, having a good time with everyone, making sure others are having a good time.

Um, are there any comparisons or contrasting ideas or feelings that you have about those late nights on either side?

Taniya Nayak: When I'm in architecture school, we were really working solo. Like you're in your own head with your own thoughts and when you're bartending, you're social and you're. Making people smile and laugh and have fun. So it was a nice outlet to do the bartending thing, but I always say there's no mistakes, right? And so every single step of our path, whether marketing for an undergrad degree made sense at the time or not, it certainly makes sense to me now. I use it every day bartending.

Why does it make sense? Cuz I know how to design a bar because I know how it works. I was behind it. I know exactly where everything's supposed to go. So I learned a great deal about design from bartending.

Dan Ryan: and that's why when you get in the argument with your husband about the round bar, you're like, no, it needs to be, but we'll settle on a chamford

Taniya Nayak: right, right.

Dan Ryan: Okay? Um, so I love this idea of no mistakes, right?

I. As we were talking earlier, um, you said something similar to that, and I don't remember exactly what it was, but what I was thinking is I once saw this t-shirt and I was in, like, I made a big, I

Taniya Nayak: are we getting t-shirt wisdom right now?

Dan Ryan: was a minute. It knocked me out

Taniya Nayak: my God.

Dan Ryan: right. Someone asked about like failing.

And uh, I was just in this place. I remember being on a bus going up to the Catskills with my daughter to go visit friends and, uh, There was this woman with a shirt and I couldn't really read what it was, and she leaned f she leaned forward a bit and it said, failure is just unfinished learning.

Taniya Nayak: Hmm.

Dan Ryan: And it was like this clarion bell ring that I was like, oh,

Taniya Nayak: that's the wisest t-shirt

Dan Ryan: Yeah. And who knew? Who knew that T-shirt wisdom would change the course of my mood and feeling and state of

Taniya Nayak: Say it again. So failure.

Dan Ryan: failure is just unfinished learning. There

Taniya Nayak: really is. And I, I think in a moment when you're in a moment where you're not sure what the heck is going on, why did that happen?

You don't, you don't know right now. You will know one day. Mm-hmm. And it's okay. And if you can tell yourself that, just give yourself the space to say, One day I'll know why this is happening, but right now I can't, for the life of me figure it out. It's stressing me out. I'm overwhelmed. But just remind yourself that there's going to come a point in your life when you're gonna say, oh, I get it now.

I know I'm at my husband because I bartended so long. You know?

Dan Ryan: Is that where you met him?

Taniya Nayak: Yeah, he was the manager. I was a bartender, you know, and, and that's how that started. But if I wasn't bartending, I. For as long as I did, I never would've met him.

Dan Ryan: And when did you start bartending? Like how old were you? Was it in college? I was

Taniya Nayak: I was too young. I was 17. I was cocktail waitressing. And then it led into bartending. It was like

Dan Ryan: All, all

in Boston.

Taniya Nayak: Yeah.

Dan Ryan: Gosh. Wow. That's amazing, huh? But I, I, I do think also going back to that kind of, as a bartender being on stage right, it's

Taniya Nayak: Very true.

Dan Ryan: it's very like cuz you're there, you're

not only serving, but you're really performing for others and getting the, the audience involved in your.

In your show, so to speak,

Taniya Nayak: It takes a very, uh, certain mindset, right? So we've all gone to a bar or a restaurant and the server just goes through the motions or the bartenders just takes your drink, doesn't smile, no interaction, no engagement.

They put the drink down. The drink tastes like shit. It's because they don't put any love into it or care or thought into it. And so it's, uh, It takes someone's special. What, I'm just gonna digress for a second here. I don't know why it's so difficult for some people to realize that all you have to do is smile, and the amount of money you're gonna make is gonna double.

It's literally put that on a t-shirt

Dan Ryan: Just smile. You'll make more

Taniya Nayak: and you'll double your money. Right? It's just, um, it's. Unbelievable to me. I remember cocktail waitressing and they had these shots in a test tube. They tasted like garbage and it was a hot outdoor place and they would just get warm really fast, and they were.

They were just gross. But every shot I sold, I would make a dollar off of it. So I would make a dollar off of every shot I sold, but then I would get tipped also on it. And I thought, well, if I'm gonna be out here selling these shots, I'm selling these shots. So I take the tray and I loaded it with ice. So all these other girls were selling their shots hot, gross.

They would make like $20. That whole day. I walked outta there with 300 bucks after a short shift because I named them like they were blue and and green and whatever, and I gave them these crazy, silly names. I had ice just falling off the tray, so the test tubes were like, frosty. I would

Dan Ryan: get

Taniya Nayak: like if they were celebrating, if it was a.

Bachelorette party, have them on their knees dumping, you know, just making it an experience and laughing with them and having fun with them, and I was making tons of money. I would've taken that shot girl job any day where everyone else hated it.

Dan Ryan: Mm-hmm.

Taniya Nayak: I

Dan Ryan: I love how you say to put love into it, because again, it's like so much of this conversation or these conversations that I have, it's really. How do you, how can you really make others feel a certain way? But you have to be open-hearted to kind of feel where they're coming from. Then you can adjust, anticipate, be intentional, and put love into it, and almost

Taniya Nayak: it's like food. You can taste, love and food.

Dan Ryan: Totally. And then, and if you have that love or, and, and you're really into that kind of showmanship, you're taking people on a, on a rollercoaster ride, like, and it could, and it. It could make such a huge difference. Whereas, you know, you go to those dinners and where you do the wine pairing, if the sommelier is like telling a story

Taniya Nayak: mm-hmm.

Dan Ryan: about the pairings of the food and I some, I don't even know really what he's saying, but he's into it.

He's passionate about

it or she, yeah, and then I'm able to suspend all disbelief and they basically take me on a ride. Whereas I've been on other ones where they're just like, oh, this is some fancy wine. You'll get hints of Blackberries and current

Taniya Nayak: like reading a script.

Dan Ryan: I'm like, eh, I'm not really feeling it. Um, T-shirt advice.

Yeah. I shared mine, but I'd never heard it put that way. Is that like a thing?

Taniya Nayak: No, I don't know. I just, well, you said it and I was like, it's T-shirt

Dan Ryan: A t-shirt. Wisdom. Okay, so T-shirt wisdom is there, can you think of any t-shirts or bumper stickers or anything that

Taniya Nayak: Oh, I had a fortune cookie once that I will always love this one. It was never trouble, trouble till trouble troubles you.

Dan Ryan: Oh.

Taniya Nayak: So don't, don't get into it. It's fine. Let it go unless something's really, really troubling you and I interpret it as communicate. Don't like beat someone up over it, but it's like never trouble.

Trouble.

Dan Ryan: Until

Taniya Nayak: trouble troubles you.

Dan Ryan: That's a lot of trouble.

That's a lot of letters to fit on. A little fortune cookie.

Taniya Nayak: I know, right?

Dan Ryan: did you frame it?

Taniya Nayak: No, but I just remember liking it. I don't know why. It just seemed to be like a quippy quirky it and it rang true.

Dan Ryan: I think, uh, the next bar or restaurant you guys do, maybe it needs to have trouble in the name.

Taniya Nayak: we hope there's no trouble in any part of it.

Dan Ryan: No in the fun, in the most fun and fun ways.

Um, okay, so you get your first break, you're doing your the tv. Which show was that?

Taniya Nayak: My first show was called Knock First.

Dan Ryan: Oh, I remember that. Oh, you go on the Airstream all over the place. That was really cool.

Taniya Nayak: it was a really fun show because it was the, the exciting part about it was that it, here I am, I'm still in school.

Okay. So I'm, I'm at the tail end of my. A master's program in interior architecture and they're saying to me, Hey, can you design a room? Now, this is the production company, not the school production company says, can you design a room that tells a story about this teenager's life through the design? So they gave me these scenarios.

One kid loves skateboarding, total straight edge kid, I guess, and skateboards and the whole thing. Favorite color is navy blue. An orange, let's just say. So I

Dan Ryan: thought you remembered that.

Taniya Nayak: I don't if, I think it probably was.

Dan Ryan: it's amazing.

Taniya Nayak: And so I created a headboard that looked like a halfpipe ramp. I made a whole bookshelf using skateboard decks, incorporated their colors.

You know, I really wanted that when you walked into that room, you literally knew everything you wanted to know about this kid. Through the design, there was one girl, the scenario was that she loves to read, she wants to be an actress, but she's kind of quiet. So I created a, a drop, like a. Theatrical curtain that was pulled off the wall.

Her bed was up against it, but behind the curtain was a vanity mirror, a clothing, uh, rolling rack for her clothes. So she felt like she was backstage getting ready and then she'd come to the front of the stage and then there was like a reading next. So that was, that's what got me that job was cuz I put all this energy into figuring out.

How to tell their story. So it's back to what you said about story, and I think that that is so key. Whether you're tasting wine from a Somalia or you're talking about design, I try to sit with our teams of our restaurants to tell them what the design story is so that they can impart that on their guests if they're interested.

Because I think it's interesting. I mean, I, of course I think it's interesting, but you know, I think customers like to hear a little bit about the history of a space, if there is history to it.

Dan Ryan: It's funny you say that cuz I remember again, going back into the, presenting it with love or just a smile. I remember my wife and I checked in to, we were living in New York City.

We checked in at the Baccarat Hotel, which is in New York. It was like a staycation for our anniversary, and I remember looking at a painting or a photo of some guy's hand or something. It was like a very weathered hand and uh, a bellman, I think it was a bellman, came up and I was like, oh, do you like that?

I was like, yeah, what? What's it all about? He's like, oh, that's one of the baccarat crystal. I don't even know what a crystal maker is, but one of the craftsmen who would make the baccarat crystals and his hand is he's a French guy, and his hands were weathered and worn and being the Baccarat hotel. And I was like, he could really say anything, but the fact that he cares and knows it really made my experience that much more memorable.

Taniya Nayak: Yeah, I, and that's exactly it. It's a, it's a talking point and you're telling me the story and you're telling your listeners this story. So clearly it worked. Yeah,

Dan Ryan: it well, it does. And I, that's why I appreciate all of your stories as well. So as we get into, so you're doing knock first, did you have a manager, an agent?

Taniya Nayak: No, I didn't know what I was

Dan Ryan: on the, on the first one you didn't, but then, so you get on all these show, you're on Oprah, you're on Ellen, you're doing all these other shows. Um, the Christmas Light show, like.

Taniya Nayak: yes, all of those things happened.

Dan Ryan: but is that you knocking or is that your determination or is it a teamwork or like what, what is that?

It's your

Taniya Nayak: I think it's a lot of, all of it. I think it's a, a perfect storm, but the one thing that I we're thinking about touching on this on stage, and I don't think we ever got to it, but I had.

Dan Ryan: had

Taniya Nayak: This job right after Knock first. So that ended. I was devastated.

Devastated. I loved it. I got bit by the bug, so I had found my first H G T V show. Guess where? Where? Craigslist?

Dan Ryan: Oh shit.

Taniya Nayak: Yeah. Somebody said, oh, you should check out the media, whatever section. But it said like looking for a young edgy designer on a new, or, yeah, looking for a young urban designer on a new edgy series on H gtv.

Dan Ryan: with overbearing Indian

Taniya Nayak: parents. Yes. Yes. It must have overbearing Indian. Exactly

Dan Ryan: You're like, oh, that's

Taniya Nayak: That's so me. Oh my gosh. This is like perfect for me. Well, it turned out, I mean, look, it could have been some crazy, who knows what scandalous situation, but I sent them the link to the show that I had just done on ABC family.

I said, I just finished the show. They called me within 30 minutes. 30 minutes and they said, we would love for you to do this show. And I said, okay. When I found out what it got paid, they needed me to be a New York local, but I live in Boston, which meant being a New York local meant I need to get myself to New York, I have to put myself up in New York because I'm a local

Dan Ryan: to be a Yankee fan.

Taniya Nayak: Never I'm out. So I ended up doing it and I was in the red. I loved what I did so much that I was okay with it. I was okay that I was actually ended up paying out of pocket for every episode that I was doing because I, I was so excited to do it and I had a conversation with the producer and I said, I have to be totally honest with you, I don't know what to do because.

I wanna keep doing the show, but I'm literally like, I have no money, like I have, I'm paying out of my pocket because I have to either stay at a friend's house and like take them out to dinner or get a hotel and pay for the train and all these things. And I said, I don't think I can do the show. And it breaks my heart because I love it so much.

And she's like, we're gonna find a way to do this for you in Boston.

Dan Ryan: Oh.

Taniya Nayak: Because she knew how much I loved it and I think she knew that there was something there. So I proved myself and my point of telling that story is that we can't get fixated on the money all the time. You know, there's, there's a time when you have to just do something cuz you love it because eventually the money will come.

Yeah. It has to come because you're loving it and you're doing a great job at

Dan Ryan: I totally agree, but it's also this theme that's come up a bunch of times in speaking with you and with a lot of the guests, but it's just so many people are scared to be vulnerable, to share that with that producer, to say, look, I wanna do it, but I can't.

Most, I, I would say that many, many people would just let it run its course. Go back to Boston, find the next one. But you sh you showed weakness or you showed vulnerability, and then they, they adjusted for

Taniya Nayak: I, it wasn't even, I didn't even think about it because it was just so real. And, and that is where we get down to authenticity and just being real. Don't have to sugarcoat anything.

I tell my employees all the time, I can't help you if you don't communicate and tell me what's wrong. Because as much as it's consuming you, if something's bothering you, it's consuming you. I have a million other things happening and I want to tell you that I notice that it's consuming you, but I might not.

And so if you don't tell me my sole purpose. Is to help you succeed. And if you don't tell me what you need, I can't give you the tools to help you succeed. Cuz believe me, if I thought you were doing a shitty job, you wouldn't be here. Right? Right. So you're here for a reason, but I all, I want, my purpose for you is to help you succeed.

And so I need you to do that for me. I need you to communicate to me what you need, and I'll do it whatever you

need.

Dan Ryan: I think the moral of this story is that you need to have better telepathic skills. Yes.

Taniya Nayak: I You mean that'd be so scary. Can you

Dan Ryan: Oh no. Ripping into other people's thoughts. Just jumping in there being like, oops.

Taniya Nayak: wish I could, I'd be laughing.

I'd literally be walking around like laughing my ass off all day.

Dan Ryan: That's so funny. Um, okay, so we have a bit of your origin story, and I know we can all learn more. And this could be, this could turn into a two hour podcast, but um, it's kind of what I'm seeing is there's this grit. There's this appreciation of self, but it was kind of a discovery of self, like who are you?

How do you move forward? Then it's like just being kind of unrelenting, keeping two feet in the TV side on the business side. Doing really well in in each. And it's gotten to you to where you are today,

Taniya Nayak: Mm-hmm.

Dan Ryan: As you look to the future, what's exciting you most? What's lighting you up as you think about the future?

Taniya Nayak: retirement?

Dan Ryan: Retirement?

Taniya Nayak: No. Uh, I don't think I'll ever retire, to be honest with you. I mean, I love the idea of it, but I, I just, too much of a, I have too much pent up energy. My husband jokes around and tells me that, he's like, I swear, you wake up in the morning, you're like tapping me on the forehead. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, you, you up?

Are you up? You already, you already, what are you gonna do today? Like, I just. I just have a lot of energy and enthusiasm for this life that I have, and I'm so grateful for it, and I'm grateful for the falls. I'm thankful that bad things, you know, not bad, bad things, but that everything isn't perfect all the time.

It's okay. One thing that I, I try to encourage people to do when they have a setback is to take a minute and allow yourself to feel it. Allow yourself to grieve and be sad, but in this might sound very, um,

Dan Ryan: uh,

Taniya Nayak: what's the word I'm look like? Systematic, I guess, or, I don't know what the word I'm looking for is, but give yourself a timeline to be sad.

Tell yourself I'm gonna be sad for 48 hours and after 48 hours, you're gonna pull yourself up and get yourself out of it, because I. Being sad is not going to change the trajectory of what just happened. So you can either get swallowed up in it and, and let that pull you down the dark hole and keep pulling you down.

Or you can make a decision to say, I am. I allowed myself to grieve. That sucked. But I, I have to get out of this. I need to move on. And I know it probably sounds a lot easier said than done. When you're hurt, you're hurt. When you're in pain, you're in pain. And there's some circumstances, obviously that is gonna be way more difficult than what I'm explaining here to get out of it.

But if you can just tell yourself, I can't change what just happened, but I can change what's going to happen.

Dan Ryan: Yeah. Or I Additionally, you could get on every bus you could find and just start reading everyone's t-shirts until you find that

Taniya Nayak: you're the wisest person in the world

Dan Ryan: and then

Taniya Nayak: like you.

Dan Ryan: Yeah. Well, I don't know if I am, but uh, I do get inspiration from bumper

Taniya Nayak: stickers.

Dan Ryan: and t-shirts, so

Taniya Nayak: They're really

Dan Ryan: good.

It's really good. Um, okay. I want to go back to your 17 year old self. So your bartending,

Taniya Nayak: giant hair.

Dan Ryan: Giant hair. What? Like where are you In Boston? Yeah. What was, what was the bar?

Taniya Nayak: Um, well I was waitressing cuz I was too young to bartend. It was a cocktail nightclub lounge

Dan Ryan: near a university. Everything's near a university in

Taniya Nayak: actually, it was in the seaport district before the seaport

Dan Ryan: District. Oh,

Taniya Nayak: District what It was like fish market. And it was back when this by day was a fish market. Turned nightclub at night and people were still allowed to smoke. So I would come home from the club and I would smell like fish and smoke

Dan Ryan: your big hair

Taniya Nayak: and my big aquanet hair.

Dan Ryan: Oh, that's amazing. Um, like eighties

Taniya Nayak: Mm-hmm. Oh,

that's,

yeah, yeah, yeah.

Dan Ryan: Um, okay, so the Tanya I'm speaking to now magically appears in front of the 17 year old Tanya. What advice do you have for yourself?

Taniya Nayak: I have a lot of advice to give 17 year old Tanya, because 17. Yeah, no, I actually never have. I know, truly. It's funny, but, uh, you're asking me this right now, and I have to tell you, my old self was overly apologetic. I was always a yes girl. I never said no. I never wanted to hurt anyone's feelings, so I only did damage to myself because I was trying to make everyone else happy. I would do it to. My own sacrifice. I might go somewhere I didn't really wanna go, or I might

Dan Ryan: just

Taniya Nayak: do something I didn't really wanna do. But I think the older I get, my sister always calls this out on me.

She's like, you used to always just go along with everything. Now she's like, now you don't wanna do it. You're so stubborn, you don't do it. And when I've like actually said to friends, even as if they, if they wanna go do something and I'm just not into it. It's okay. It's okay. I just say, Hey, you guys go ahead.

I'm gonna sit this one out and I'm not gonna feel bad about it because I don't wanna go. Or, or you know, and I, this is just kind of a dumb example, but I mean this, even in business, I might meet with a potential client and I'm not getting those vibes. I don't feel like this is gonna go well. Um, And instead of me trying to force it just because they wanna work with me, which is so complimentary and in your mind you think, oh, they wanna work with me.

Of course I want to help them. But it's not always the right fit. And it's important to know how to say no for your own good, your own piece of mind. And the more you do it, the happier you're gonna be. It feels really good.

Dan Ryan: Yeah, I, there's cer and there are ways to say no where the other person gets it and. Gets re and respects it and is like, oh wow, I totally get it. I have another friend. He's like, look, if it's not a fuck yes, I'm not doing

Taniya Nayak: right. And that's great. I mean, that's extreme, I guess, but that's like, it's very enthusiastic

about everything. Right? Right.

Dan Ryan: a lot of incoming we're like,

Taniya Nayak: But that's right. And the older we get, the busier we are and the more spread than we are, and you know, more emphasis we're putting on our family.

So,

Dan Ryan: our

Taniya Nayak: is so precious. I feel like time is actually the most precious thing, more than money, more than anything. So it's how you spend that time is, is so important for your own mental wellness. Mm-hmm. You know?

Dan Ryan: know, I totally agree. And we're all given the same amount of time and we can't make more. Uh, and I'm super grateful for your time

Taniya Nayak: here. Thank you. I'm grateful for yours too,

Dan Ryan: and I really appreciate it. It's been so great to get to know you, and I know we're gonna have a wonderful relationship moving forward.

And it's like, again, it's all about. The people in the relationships and finding those kindred spirits. So thank you so much.

Taniya Nayak: Thank you. This was awesome. And you are a great guy. I really appreciate all of your time. And your, again, I said this earlier, your thoughtful questions and your inquisitive mind. I know that when we speak you, you're really listening and I know that you're, um, Processing and it is hard sometimes to just be on the other side just listening.

Because as a podcast host, that's your job. Ask the questions and listen and engage, and you do a really great job at it.

Dan Ryan: Well, thank you. And Tanya, if people wanted to learn more about you or your business or anything, how do they, how do they find out more? Where do they find you?

Taniya Nayak: I make it real simple. It's at Tanya Naac, just my first and last name.

I'm not on LinkedIn, but I am on Instagram. I'm on, uh, Facebook. I, I have a Twitter account. I don't use it that often, but you'll find me on at Tanya Naac with everything and my website too.

Dan Ryan: Awesome. We'll be sure to put it in there. And I look forward to continuing this relationship and thank you. Thank you, thank you. And also thank you listeners, because if it wasn't for you, we wouldn't be here right now. She wouldn't even gimme the time of day if it wasn't for you.

Taniya Nayak: It's a true story

Dan Ryan: But thank you because, um, it just means a lot that you're listening and if this has changed your idea on how you can present hospitality or design or your path or your journey. Um, if it changed your thinking on that, please pass it along to others because we grow by word of mouth and we appreciate you.

Thank you.

Taniya Nayak: Like, and

subscribe.

Dan Ryan: li like and subscribe. Thank you.